6 signs your relationship may be toxicToxic relationships - whether they are romantic, friendships, inter-familial relationships, or even work relationships - are all detrimental to your health and happiness. If a relationship in your life has been affecting you in more negative ways than positive, it’s imperative that you reflect on that relationship and consider whether or not it’s worth maintaining.
These are six signs that indicate you are in a toxic relationship:
You can’t be yourself
Does it seem like you’re a different person when you’re around this person? No matter the type of relationship you have with another person, you should feel comfortable in your own skin and happy to be yourself, not ashamed when you’re with them. One of the qualities of a healthy relationship is their acceptance of your quirks and flaws because those things are undeniably a part of you, and vice versa.
They always choose their happiness over yours
How often do you feel like you’re sacrificing your needs for theirs? When a bad day happens, you become their emotional dumpster where they vent all their complaints. However, when your happiness is compromised, you’re completely pushed aside. Toxic people value themselves above all and do not, or cannot, care about anyone else
Day after day you’re emotionally exhausted
It’s never possible to have any sort of relationship that’s devoid of conflict, but they shouldn’t occur regularly or leave you drained. If the person you love is constantly flying off the handle at the slightest occurrence or is quick to complain, you can’t expect them to mature and grow with you. You shouldn’t have to be coy with certain conversations or not perform specific actions in order to not provoke your loved one. If an argument should arise, the more natural and adult response is to resolve it in a respectful manner.
They don’t treat you with respect
A loved one who has no respect for you is a hazard to your well-being and self-esteem. They snap at you, interrupt you when you speak, and criticize you, which causes you to feel self-conscious and insecure. In addition, people make jokes all the time - but your loved one shouldn’t make backhanded comments that make you question your worth. Other examples of them disrespecting you include putting down or disregarding your accomplishments, constantly arriving late to plans, pretending you don’t exist, or becoming angrily passive-aggressive. If you didn’t love this person, would you still stick around?
Communication breakdowns are all-too-common
Do you feel like the only conversation topics that are safe to talk about are small-talk topics because you’re worried about setting them off? The most significant aspect of a relationship is communication because that’s where trust is built. Without trust, a relationship cannot survive. For example, let’s say they had a drinking problem and were aware of it, but refused to get treatment. They brush off your encouragement to consider seeking counseling and retort with the contempt that one of the myths related with treatment is results that don’t last; the “band-aid” of treatment would wear off and they’d be right back where they started
If you can’t talk to your loved one, trust has been shattered. It’s a serious red flag when you feel safer confiding in other friends or family, and even more telling when they have nothing nice to say.
They are controlling or act extremely possessive
Last but not least, a toxic person is crazily obsessed with your personal life. Questions like “where are you?”, “who are you with?”, and “what are you doing?” fill up your inbox and voicemail. This kind of suffocating questioning is a clear sign that they have the problem and not you. Other indicators, like acting jealous and possessive, clearly show that your friend has some serious self-confidence issues that are hurting your relationship. The best of friends would still work with them to try and help them, but at some point, you have to do what’s right for you.
Sometimes, we may not even realize we are in toxic relationships: that’s why it’s important to take a step back from relationships when we have suspicions and evaluate if our time is being well-spent with them. When you recognize that you are in an unhealthy relationship, find the strength in yourself to break it off immediately. Your life should only have room for people who truly have your best interest at heart; who add to it, rather than detract.
about the author…Rachel is a freelance content writer located in San Diego, California currently writing for Medically Assisted. Over the course of her career, she has written a variety of health, parenting, and fitness articles. In her free time, she enjoys running along the beach with her two puppies and practicing yoga.